Dance Me to the End of Love
It's a new moon in Pisces and we fishies do love to dream. Thanks to the rigours of family life the dreams I remember these days are far and few between. And so, when I have the luxury of a bit of a lie in and my dreams can percolate into the new dawn, I'm ever so grateful.
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| My gorgeous Gran Edwina |
This morning I awoke with the image of my gran fresh in my mind's eye. She was in a bed, as she was when I saw her last. In this dreamscape I had unwittingly been sleeping on the ground floor below her dead body. I said to my mom who was still standing witness at her bedside that it was time to bury her.
My granny was the doyenne of the dance world in Pretoria. She would organise the seasonal dance eisteddfods and had a dance studio beneath her mansion on the hill. I was dancing from the moment I could walk and my daughter has followed suit.
Today my girl got fitted for her first pointe shoes. Something she has been looking forward to for ages and has been prepared beautifully for by her angelic ballet teacher of many years, Leilani. And so the dance of life continues. It dances through us and around us. My grandpa would put on some Old Blue Eyes and dance my gran around their lounge. The red velvet furniture and oil paintings of my Great Great Grandpa lit by my gran's crystal chandeliers.
Dance me to the End of Love by Leonard Cohen was the song I found to articulate something of the feeling after we lost my Granny Edwina. My mom loved this version saying, "It's quiet, like her."
Dance me through the panic till I'm gathered safely in
Lift me like an olive branch and be my homeward dove
Dance me to the end of love
Dance me to the end of love
Let me feel you moving like they do in Babylon
Show me slowly what I only know the limits of
Dance me to the end of love
Dance me to the end of love
Dance me very tenderly and dance me very long
We're both of us beneath our love, we're both of us above
Dance me to the end of love
Dance me to the end of love
Dance me through the curtains that our kisses have outworn
Raise a tent of shelter now, though every thread is torn
Dance me to the end of love
Dance me through the panic till I'm gathered safely in
Touch me with your naked hand or touch me with your glove
Dance me to the end of love
Dance me to the end of love
Dance me to the end of love
My family and I enjoyed some healing time in the Forest, connecting with the spirit of my brother Jason who would have turned 43 tomorrow.
Now I look forward to a week of many treasures.
Time with dear old friends tomorrow. Then the All About Writing flagship Creative Writing course starts on Monday which is a bday pressie from my hubby and what I settled on rather than going for another MA because, as the delightful Jo-Anne Richards put it, "you already have a Master's Degree." She and Richard were a real lifeline for me and many other scribblers through Lockdown with their free weekly Zoom webinars and perfect Monday Motivation emails, I swear the synchronicity on those are often next level. Pre-COVID I so enjoyed a workshop with them at pretty Casa Labia. Jo-Anne gives fantastic on the spot critique. I'm so grateful for that at this point, someone with a clear eye who can point out your strengths and help you overcome your weaknesses. She also happens to be the MA advisor to the dear friend who is coming for brunch tomorrow. How's that for a neat little soul circle.
I've also been cast in a Wellness shoot which is equal parts nerve wracking and exciting, as T put it, "You're getting a makeover mom!" So great to be out of my comfort zone - that's where life's great adventures lie after all and where so much can be learned. I love that I'm always learning and that at 45 I feel like I'm only beginning!
Our weekly Qi Gong circle meets on Thursdays on Noordhoek Common from 4:30-5pm. What a lovely group! Come and join us before the winter weather sets in.
And then most exciting of all, J and I are off on a Zen Meditation Retreat for the Human Rights long weekend and Autumn Equinox at the Home of African Zen -- the Dharma Centre in Robertson. More than ever I feel that Meditation is the key to our wellbeing and simply the best use of our time here. Certainly a Human Right to be explored and shared.
My new favourite podcast is Deconstructing Yourself. It's absolutely compulsory listening for anyone interested in Meditation...or even if you're not into meditation, you will be after listening to a couple of episodes.
I'm indebted to Michael Taft for introducing me to Shinzen Young and Dan Brown (not that one!), both of whom have named so much of my Inner Journey and in so doing have helped me claim it. Truly its been so affirming. They generously offer many free resources.
Listening to all of these beautiful souls and brilliant teachers has brought home the necessity of residing deeply and truly in our hearts. The head stuff is certainly fascinating and I'm grateful to their intellects for sharing insights. But the heart is where the magic lies.
It's been a good long while since J and I used to go on meditation retreats at Nan Hua temple near Pretoria. I went trawling this here ol' blog for mention of our happy times there and found this post from 15 years ago.
It strikes me that my happy-go-lucky synopsis that passed for a blog post leaves out so much, but also captures much of the insouciance of youth. If I can barely recognise this voice of 15 years past, what do the next 15 hold?
For those who have been on Retreat with me before and would like to deepen their practice I have a mini-Retreat at a beautiful spot in Camps Bay offered by one of my dear retreatants, Tracey Creer, who joined the Bodhi Khaya Retreat.
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| https://fb.me/e/1ytSAA5In |
R400
Dinner to be self-catered.
Breakfast can be catered at R80 per person.
Optional self guided Sunday morning practice.
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